Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
