Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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