If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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