there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
