i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
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Houston, we have a blender
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
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I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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