Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
