Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
