Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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