He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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