LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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