i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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