I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Can you bring me the toilet please
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
