Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize