what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
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Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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