I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
She told me I should be a condom model.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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