ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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