There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
The adults are the big ones right?
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