Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
