Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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