I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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