that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
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