she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
