Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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