Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
