I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
