Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
