he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
