Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
