Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She even gives head with a lisp.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased