But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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