sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
