she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Randomize