we have pet lesbian snakes
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
You ruined the universe
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Randomize
