i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
