i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
