Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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