I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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