I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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