Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
