good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
this is an emotional support booty call
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
