If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
