I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
