it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
