I looked at my own cervix.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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