he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize