Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
