there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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