Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Randomize
