It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
grandma shit on top of the toilet
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
how drunk are you?
Several
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize