the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
