is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize
